My heart is so heavy right now. I have no words to express my condolences for the tragic event that took place today in Newtown, Connecticut. Since reading the news I haven’t been able to get the thought of it out of my mind, nor even grasp it’s reality. I really don’t understand how something like this can happen, and every time that it does (I can’t even believe that I just said that) it brings me to my knees just thinking about what the victims’ families are experiencing right now.

What disgusts me is the realization of what tomorrow will hold. For though the very thought of this catastrophe pains me beyond what I can bear, I remorsefully admit that in time it will become to me yet another vague memory. Fading further into my my aging subconscious, like casting grains of sand into the wake of unforgiving waves, I will, undoubtably, forget this gut-wrenching feeling that burns within me.

I’ll wake up tomorrow still laden with sadness, but it will pass as I continue through my daily routine. Perhaps in the stillness of thought, while I perform some meaningless and mindless task, I’ll be reminded of the horrific incident and the sorrow will return. The discussion of gun-control may come up at lunch, but we’ll change the subject eventually. I will pray and I will plead for comfort and peace to be showered upon the afflicted families, but as the days go by it will pass from my thoughts, each day growing fainter and fainter.

Yet – the thought that tears the beating heart from my chest is to know that a father left home this morning not knowing that it would be the last time he would lay eyes on his daughter; that a mother spent her morning wrapping Christmas presents for a son that will never open them; that a husband didn’t know December 13 would be the last night he could lay his arm across his wife as she slept through the night. To me this was a shocking headline, but to them this nightmare is reality; one which will continue to haunt them for the rest of their lives. This breaks my heart more than anything. I have nothing to offer them, no word of guidance nor gesture of comfort that could possibly take their pain away. I feel, for the first time in my life, utterly useless.

What can we do? Where do we go from here? How do we deal with something so terrible? I have no answers. I could say things like, “Live each day as though it were your last,” and, “Tell the people you love that you love them, because you may not get another chance…” I have no solution, so I ask that you would pray for the ones who lost someone today.

Pray that Peace would grace their lips a kiss long overdue.